i k1lled my mother
it wasn't my fault
For this Girl of 25, life with Herself is always turbulent.
This morning is particularly overwhelming. She is assaulted by self-doubt, unemployment, too much social media, and Her Mother. But, She must brave the mundanity and frivolity of urban girlhood, all while searching for someone to blame.
This is the story of an ordinary day in Her life.
a teaser from the show at Jairangam Festival 2023, Jawahar Kala Kendra, Jaipur
reviews
"What stands out is the depiction of mothers in India, a country where motherhood is glorified but the actual reality in terms of how we treat mothers is contradictory."
- The Sunday Mid-Day
"A skilfully crafted example of decolonial theatre practice ... allows for both English and Hindi to have their spotlight moments ... Proves itself to be more than a 'fresh take' on an already exhausted topic of 'female coming-of-age.'"
- The Theatre Times
"An eye-opening piece on how social media silently conditions how we think about and react to situations in life."
- TheatreRoom
"Shah writes with empathy and humour; directing her first play, she reaches across to her audience of mostly young people who surely hear and perhaps relate to the woman's minor traumas ... Hopefully Mallika Shah will write more plays—Gen Z could do with some astute representation. Films and serials are still trying to make sense of Millennials."
- Mumbai Theatre Guide
Irawati Karnik
Academic Head at Drama School Mumbai
Mahesh Dattani, Playwright
Audience Member
I Killed my Mother / It Wasn’t my Fault is my effort to depict life on a bad day. In 2019, a bad day to me meant my mother being annoyed with me for some mysterious reason that had to do with my daily habits, unemployment, not having the willpower to get off my phone, and feeling a heightened sense of loneliness. The idea began and grew from investigating what is The War with the Self, wanting to write longform stream-of-consciousness, and questioning class privilege in young, urban women like me. The idea then grew at Indian Ensemble’s First Draft: Ideas Lab, where Chanakya Vyas, Karen D’mello, Abhimanyu Acharya, and a most wonderful cohort of fellow writers, witnessed its first iterations.
What followed was a lot of nudging and nagging from friends and family who believed in me when I wasn’t able to, some desperate attempts at changing careers, waves of a pandemic, and finally a push of self-assertion in the form of a grant from my alma mater, the Drama Schools Foundation Mumbai. What you see today is no longer just mine. I Killed my Mother / It Wasn’t my Fault belongs to everyone on stage and off who has contributed to its telling, it belongs to frivolous women, it belongs to this new generation of youth, and it belongs to you who are watching it today.
director's note
The lead up to the murder.
Click to watch the snippet.
performed by
Shreya Sharma, Astha Gulati, Dusha, Meghna Manglani, Riya Soni, Mithil Raj Goswami
Veda Factory, March 2023
in Mumbai at
Prithvi Theatre; National Centre for the Performing Arts; G5A Warehouse; Veda Factory
in Pune at
The Box; Shreeram Lagoo Rang Avkash by Maharashtra Cultural Centre
in Bangalore at
Ranga Shankara; Bangalore International Centre
in Jaipur at
Jawahar Kala Kendra
produced by
KathaSiyah [2023]
tafreehwale [2023-25]
supported by
Niloufer Sagar Alumni Production Grant, DSM
Manch - a co-production initiative by Bhasha Centre & District by Zomato
performed by
Shreya Sharma
Astha Gulati
Dusha / Janhvi Marathe / Meghana AT
Meghna Manglani / Shumaila Shaikh
Riya Soni / Anoushka Zaveri
Mithil Raj Goswami / Vaibhav Kapatia
playwright & director Mallika Shah
projection design Meghana AT
light design Adi Shastri
sound design Manish Khushalani
visual design Malvika Dwivedi
executive producers Mallika Shah & Meghana AT